In a contested Connecticut child custody case, the Family Court may decide that the child live primarily with the mother or with the father the “best interest of the child.”
Here are seven important considerations:
1) Primary caretaker. There is usually one parent who is primarily responsible for daytime routine such feeding, bathing, taking the child to school or bus stop etc.
2) Abuse of alcohol or drugs. Abuse alcohol or use of drugs will almost guarantee that the other parent will be awarded residential custody. If the abuse is extensive seek help immediately or supervised visits may be ordered.
3) Involvement with the child’s school and activities. Attend school conferences, help with homework, attend practices, games, recitals etc.
4) Disparaging the other parent. Avoid at all times making negative statements about the other parent to the child or projecting your anger toward the parent on to the child. In addition, allow the other parent access to the child and follow the current court orders. Interfering with the relationship the child has with the other parent may result in the other parent being awarded custody.
5) Support the relationship with the other parent. You should demonstrate to the judge that you recognize the value of child’s relationship with the other parent. This may include being flexible with your time if a scheduling conflict arises or encouraging the child to spend the time with the other parent when the child is reluctant.
6) Cooperating with other professionals in the case. In a contested custody case Family Relations may be ordered to conduct a Study. A court may appoint a guardian ad litem to advocate for your child’s best interests. A court may also appoint a psychologist or psychiatrist. Your cooperation and your presentation with these professionals is often crucial in terms of their perception of your credibility and parental judgement. A parent should highlight their strengths as a parent rather than focus on perceived weaknesses of the other parent when dealing with other professionals in the case.
7) Involving the child in other relationships. You may have moved on. Your child has not. Do not involve your child in the relationship with your new “interest.” Do not try to replace the other parent and do not introduce the child to a significant other prematurely.