Most of us know a narcissist or three. And we have all had run-ins with @$$holes.
But did you marry or have a child with one?
And why am I writing about this in the context of a divorce blog?
Because the divorce process is stressful and sometimes this causes people to act in ways they eventually regret.
It is often said that divorce lawyers see good people behaving badly. The divorce process can trigger greed and selfishness. Spouses may become violent. Still other spouses focus on retribution at virtually any cost.
Point 1: Do not be that person. Avoid these antics or your case will be compromised. The judge will dislike you. Your lawyer (if you still have one) will find it difficult to effectively represent you. You may even (consciously or not) take it out on your children.
Point 2: Good news. It seems that the real “maladaptive” (crazy $h!t) stops after the first couple years post divorce. By then, the drama is over and emotions are under control. Folks are simply worn out or have otherwise moved on.
So, if you are still scrapping with your ex years after you have been divorced, is he or she a narcissist or just an @$$hole?
Take a listen on how to handle a “difficult” ex here:
Audio: Is Your Ex a Narcissist or Just an Asshole? @ SpokenWord.org